My relationship with God

"Does God exist?". Someone recently started a discussion this 'Times Of India' site called www.speakingree.in

Just reading the question angered me and amused me. In this quest of God and his existence, a common man became Buddha, years of hunger and meditation, people became mystics and took upto the Himalayas never to come back again. Someone out there hopes to find God/ ascertain his existence by an internet discussion!!!!! It is a silly question and deserves not to be talked about. It is like asking me, does your mother exist? How could I have possibly come into this world without my mother giving birth to me. How can mankind/all beings on this earth take birth and come into existence without our supreme mother/father-God.

More important than discussing "Does god exist?", it is important to introspect and ask yourself. "What does god mean to me?". And the answer lies in that. Each of our experience of god varies. It is as unique as a finger print. Just as no 2 human beings carry the same design of a finger print, so is the case with our belief of god. If I believe in God truly and devoutly, than it just does not matter to me whether rest of the world does or not. From my belief perspective this discussion is not worth of an involvement. Now coming to the question of his existence, if someone (who does not believe in God/or a divine power beyond human comprehension) can answer my few simple questions, I too will agree and start believing that god does not exist.

1) How and when was the universe created?
2) What is the dimension of this universe? You know the length, depth etc.
3) How many celestial bodies are there in the universe?
4) How do these celestial bodies (which are actually huge and weigh many many trillions of tons) remain freely suspended in the universal vacuum or space as we call it?

If someone can answer all these questions for me, I salute his/belief and agree there is no god and all this is just plain western science.

But if no one on this earth can answer my questions, than kindly retract the question. GOD IS THE SUPREME POWER/AUTHORITY/Beyond our limited human acquired knowledge. You man choose to call this authority by any name/gender/ alpha/beta.It does not matter! Don't debate his existence and ruin your chances of finding true divine happiness. Believe and let him guide you towards him.

God is my silent friend and well wisher. I speak to him about everything that is there inside me, I seek his guidance when I am at crossroads in life, I ask him for his for help when everything else fails, I ask him for his love and solace when unhappy and sad and so much more. My relationship with God is very special and unique. It defines me the person.

Further, people often engage God and his existence in trivia. My sorrow, my karma, my happiness or sadness, my plight or success...and as a result start thinking of/ about God in a human context, at a human scale and in the known human dimensions.

Only a soul in the dark, unawakened can ask this question, "Does God exist?". For the light of God has not yet touched his soul. In a dark room, when we light a candle, initially nothing is visible. But as the light increases all the objects become clearer. The light is self knowledge and awareness is required for God to be visible.

Living an unconventional life

Thanks to God, each one of us is born with unlimited opportunity. He brings us into the world as cute little babies and then like a proud mother waits for us to grow up and succeed in life. To prevent boredom and to make the earth and interesting place, he made each of us different. Unlike the Brinjals (Aubergines) and the Potatoes!!! God was of the view that in creating us the way he did (different from each other) he was gifting mankind with an immense potential for greatness. Each life is a unique life with infinite possibilities. How exciting!

But it is a very disappointing job being God! Because no body wants to lead a different life. There are no takers for his potential.Generations after generations, we want to live life the same. Spend precious minutes of god gifted life on meaningless chores - playing, studying, eating , sleeping, fighting, falling in love, falling out of love, making money, loosing money, being happy, being unhappy, marrying, divorcing, having children, not having children and then death.

Not that there weren't those who dared to differ. They too were children of God. Of whom he is immensely proud. Jesus Christ, Lord Buddha, Mother Teresa...... a life of compassion........yes, they choose a different path. The unconventional path.....so they were shunned and hurt and insulted...but they continued...because it was the path of God. It was the path of his glory.

Do not condemn and ridicule those who want to live an unconventional life. They are only fulfilling god's wish. Using some of his gift- the potential to be unique.

Striking a balance

There are times while meditating, I manage to reach strange depths within my self. An unknown zone of existence in my mind and conscience. I am lost somewhere deep within myself cut off from the external world. It is a divine experience. Complete bliss. Those who have experienced deep meditation will understand or appreciate my words. I manage to cut through the noise and clutter of outside world. When I gradually open my eyes after meditation......for the first few seconds my mind is lost. It fails to connect with the outside world. It tries to establish a connect with the outside physical world. Naming things, recognising people, establishing a context. Slowly the pleasant effect of meditation starts fading away. It all comes back. Work, money matters, society and various pressures of our contemporary human existence start taking control like the tentacles of an Octopus. The peace and quite which I had found during meditation vapourises. One thought echoes in my mind "Welcome back to the insanity of human existence!!!!"

I become a mixed bag of human emotions. Angry one second, happy next and again sad the third second. And so the pendulum of emotions keeps oscillating. Coping with life and the demands made upon me by the outside world. No grudge as far as the demands are concerned. The world has a right to make demands on me. I am obliged to meet their requirements. This is my Niyat Karma (Destined Karma I am born with). But yes, the noise and the clutter of the external world irritates me. I crave for the peace and the quite inside me. Sounds of joy, chatter of family members, the birds and breeze, Small children crying or laughing, people chanting prayers, soothing music....all good but still noise.Traffic, people screaming and shouting, making demands, fighting with each other...all bad again noise.

Given my wordly commitments and responsibilities it is not possible to remain in a state of meditation at all times. The dilemma is whether to seek the depths within myself which requires me to cut off from the outside world or to give up the quest for self and focus only on the outside world? I feel like a Pilot who is flying a plane at 30,000 feet above the ground with a few hundred pasengers on board. Even if the poor fellow has a sudden urge to quit his job and leave the plane, he is bound not to do so. He is bound by a sense of responsibility to fly the plan to a safe destination. We are all seeking to fly our planes to the safe destinations. As helpless as the pilot. Forced to give up the self needs and focus on those we feel responsible about, willing or unwilling.

It is all about making the choices. Religious teachers say "strike a balance", corporate trainers say, "work-life balance", saints call it a state of "Samadhi". But how do I attain it? Is it really possible for anyone to attain a state of "Samadhi" in the physical form of exisitence? Remain bonded to the external world and yet strike a balance between the self and the outside world. Is giving up one of the two the only way to attain peace?. As did Mother Teresa; loosing the self completely in serving the outside world or as did Lord Buddha; loosing the outside world completely and retreating deep within oneself?

But then even that is not a balance!!!!